Living for Today Page 3

  “He’s not doing so well,” Drew says.

  “Maybe he’s just tired. I didn’t notice it earlier today.”

  “Maybe.”

  “I know Ava said his cancer is terminal, but are you sure there isn’t something anyone can do?”

  “There’s brain surgery, but it’s risky. He’ll die without it, and more than likely he’ll die with it. He has a pretty grim prognosis.”

  “He doesn’t want to take a chance that the surgery might work?”

  “No. Where the tumor is, there’s a slim chance for them to remove the whole tumor without causing permanent or serious injury to him. He’d rather die than live and be paralyzed or brain dead.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “Thanks, Skylar. So am I.”

  Over the next few days, Xander, Drew, and Rachael spend a lot of time together. When Rachael rests, Drew and Xander spend time with Ava and me. I know that Xander gets up early and stays up late. Ava says he wants to finish his book while he can. If I was dying, the last thing I would want to do is to write a book. I’d spend my last days surrounded by my family, friends, and good food. I’ve been dieting for what feels like my entire adult life, so I would indulge in all the foods I’ve avoided over my lifetime. I say that now, but I probably wouldn’t. I’d hope I would be among the small percent of people to survive terminal cancer and live to talk about it. I’d do everything I could to be in remission, no matter how slim the chance. But I would indulge in the healthy food I like. I would eat pints of blueberries and strawberries every day.

  Thanksgiving is Thursday and Rachael and Claire decided we should decorate and have a Thanksgiving Day feast at the inn. Of course, Ava called Steve and Lou Ann to see what they do for the holidays. Not surprising to learn, they also cook for their guests because their family comes in for the weekend and so they make dinner for everyone. Lou Ann said that they have only a few guests who stay over the winter holidays. “We are usually busy for a week just before Christmas, but nothing to speak of the other days in December.”

  I’m not sure what got into Ava, but she goes outside in the garage, and starts to bring in the Christmas tree and the holiday decorations from storage.

  “I thought Claire and Rachael said we should put up Thanksgiving decorations. Did they?”

  Ava smiles while opening up several of the boxes. “They did. I thought it’d be nice to get the inn ready for Christmas while we’re at it.”

  “Rushing the holidays a bit, aren’t you?”

  “Maybe a little.” She looks up at me with sad puppy dog eyes. “I want Xander to have a nice holiday. Would you mind helping?”

  I look at all of the clear totes sitting in the middle of the room. “Give me one of those C.D.’s, I need some Christmas music to get me in the mood.”

  Before the end of the day, every guest staying at the inn is helping to put up the decorations. When we run out of exterior lights, Drew and Xander leave to get some more. Rachael and Claire are very precise in telling them what kind of lights and decorations to buy. Apparently, you need candles, lots and lots of red and white candles, and cranberry-scented wax for the wax warmers. While the guys are gone, we continue to decorate the trees in the foyer to greet our guests, and we put the other one tree in the tearoom.

  Claire and Rachael are getting close and it’s nice to see them happy. Xander hasn’t had any more problems with seizures, and it’s a relief for everyone. I can see him grow weaker with every day that passes, but I don’t mention it. He smiles, writes, and spends his spare time with Ava and his family. She likes him and if she’s happy, that’s all I care about. I do worry about her when… well, I just worry about her.

  When Drew isn’t with Rachael or Xander, he’s with me. Like me, he loves the water and the beach. One day when I was headed down to Tybee Island, he kind of invited himself, and he’s been going with me everyday since then. He’s good company and I like being around him.

  On Wednesday, Lou Ann came over to bake pies and desserts with us for Thanksgiving, while Steve stayed behind and entertained their family and guests. Daniel flew his plane in to spend the holidays with his family at the inn. Marshall called and said he couldn’t come; the only thing I could make out between Claire’s sobs is something about heavy traffic. Chase, my mom, and my brother also drove in to spend the holidays with us.

  Claire

  I broke down when Marshall called and said traffic was too bad, and he couldn’t make it for Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow. Heavy storms in Florida often make it difficult for people to travel. Roads become slick and lightning strikes are a big concern. Multiple car accidents have made travel near impossible for him. When I control my tears, I walk downstairs to join in the holiday festivities.

  Daniel says, “Claire, we have our plane over at the airport. We could take you to Lake City to pick Marshall up, then bring him back here for the holidays.”

  I look at Daniel. “No, it’s okay, but thank you.”

  “By plane, we could be there in less than an hour.”

  “Daniel, thank you. I don’t want to put you out.”

  “It’s no bother, really. Drew and I would be more than happy to do it. It looks like the storms have moved from the area.”

  I look around the room and everyone is here but Marshall. Even Skylar’s mom and brother are here for Thanksgiving. I can see the sadness in my daughter’s eyes and it hurts me to see her so sad. I don’t want to put him out, but I also don’t want to see Ava sad for one more second. It’s the holidays, and families should all be together.

  “Are you sure I won’t be putting you out?”

  “As long as we make it back before Thanksgiving dinner, it’s no problem.” Daniel smiles at me so I know it won’t be a problem. Everyone laughs and it puts my concerns at ease. “Dinner isn’t for another 18 hours or so, I’m pretty sure we’ll be back by then.”

  “Get your coat, and I’ll call Dad to let him know you’re on your way so he’ll be ready,” Ava says excitedly.

  “Skylar, do you want to come with us?” Drew asks.

  “You’re driving?”

  “I’m flying if that’s what you’re asking, Dad will co-pilot this trip.”

  She grins. “You don’t have to ask me twice, let me get my jacket.”

  We say our goodbyes to everyone and head to the plane. I’m impressed with the skills of Drew and Daniel flying the plane and I’m excited to be able to get Marshall and bring him back so he can spend Thanksgiving with his family.

  “Well, it seems the problem with the traffic begins here,” Drew says. Skylar and I look out the window. “Looks like traffic is backed up probably from a semi accident hauling hazmat materials.” All I can see is a long line of headlights and taillights.

  As soon as we land, I call an Uber driver to take us to the house. Drew and Daniel both stay at the airport with the plane, while Skylar rides with me to the house.

  “I haven’t heard from Ava. I sure hope she was able to get ahold of Marshall to tell him we’re coming.”

  “I’m sure she did, and I’m sure he’ll be excited to not have to spend Thanksgiving alone.”

  “You know, he was more worried about Ava being alone than anything.”

  We pull into the driveway and I can see the lights on in the house. Skylar says, “He didn’t have to worry about Ava being alone.”

  “I know.”

  We arrange for the Uber driver to wait for us before we go into the house. When I open the door, Marshall is sitting on the sofa facing the front door, and a woman is sitting on the couch facing him. I stop at the doorway and Skylar bumps into me. The woman has a short brown bob haircut, and she’s wearing jeans and Marshall’s sweatshirt. I can’t see her face, but I think I know who it is. Marshall stands when he sees me. Skylar walks around me so she can get a better view of what’s going on.

  “Oh,” Skylar says.

  Marshall looks worried. He doesn’t walk towards me, but stands in place.

  “What’s g
oing on?” I ask. I look at Marshall and then down at the woman sitting on our couch. She stands and turns around so I can see her.

  “Oh, my God, Nichole.”

  She’s holding a washcloth to her nearly swollen shut left eye. Her mouth is bleeding with a laceration across the top lip, and her face has dried blood on it.

  “What happened?” I rush over to her and help her to a sitting position. “Skylar, would you get her a glass of water, please?” I know I should wait for someone to answer me, but my mind is racing with questions. Has she been mugged? Why aren’t the police here? Where’s her car? How did Marshall get involved? “What happened?” This time I sit down and wait for someone to answer me. Nichole is sitting beside me and I feel her trembling.

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t have anyplace else to go,” she whispers.

  I look at Marshall for answers and he can’t give me any. He sits down on the other side of Nichole. “You don’t need to be sorry, you’re always welcome here.” I look at her sadly.

  She tries to smile, but is unsuccessful. “Thank you.”

  “What happened? Should we call the police or Brett for you?”

  She shivers and I look at Marshall for answers. Again, nothing. Skylar comes into the room with a glass of water and another wet washcloth. “Put this on your lip. It’ll help with the swelling.”

  “Thank you.”

  There’s a car horn and I suddenly remember the Uber driver parked in the driveway. “I’ll tell him to go on.”

  “Thank you, Skylar.”

  “No problem.” She gets her wallet from her purse and leaves out the front door.

  Suddenly, I remember Nichole’s words. “I’m sorry, I didn’t have anyplace else to go.” I remember Ava’s dreams of Connor abusing her. I remember Ava’s X-rays of her broken wrist, broken ribs, and her front dental implants; all are consistent with her dreams of abuse by Connor.

  “Brett did this?”

  She nods her head and cries.

  Ava

  Skylar calls and tells me that they arrived safely, but they’ll be late. She was very vague when she called. I have to wonder if air traffic is the problem. Is there even such a problem as air traffic on the holidays? Rachael, Xander, Chase, Skylar’s mom, Jessica, Mark (Jessica’s brother), and I cook, laugh, and have a great time. The house smells of cranberry and is filled with holiday cheer. The inn didn’t have any guests for the holidays, so the families were each able to get a room of their own. When everyone turns in for the night, Xander and I watch a movie in his room. He looked tired this evening, but he refused to go to bed and rest. I didn’t say anything to him, but he and Rachael exchanged looks that spoke loudly and clearly that she wanted him to go and rest.

  I change my clothes and decide to wear something more comfortable. A pair of red plaid sleep pants and a white long-sleeved tee shirt is my outfit of choice. We lie on top of his covers and watch Planes, Trains, and Automobiles, starring John Candy and Steve Martin. We have popcorn and wine, and we laugh and cuddle. I like this movie, but some parts make me sad. Xander is very sensitive to my needs and is very sweet. Since I chose this movie, he insists he gets to pick the next holiday movie. He chooses something uplifting that he knows I will enjoy: a 30-minute TV special — A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving.

  When the last movie is over, he takes his evening meds and I stand from the bed.

  “Are you leaving?” he asks. I watch as he also stands from the bed. His adjusts his white tee shirt and plaid sleep pants. “I’d like for you to stay.” Before I have time to say anything, he says, “Just for the night. I just want to hold you, nothing else.”

  I remove the pillows and fold back the quilt and the sheet on my side of the bed, indicating I’ll stay. He smiles and mimics my movements. We climb in bed and I cuddle into him.

  We talk about past holidays, family traditions, and this Thanksgiving holiday. We don’t speak of the future, since Xander’s future is unclear. I’m assuming he’ll be here for Christmas; I hope and pray he’ll still be with us this Christmas.

  The front door opens and we get out of bed to greet our families. “Looks like the slumber party ended before I was ready,” Xander says.

  I wrap my arm around his waist and stand on my tiptoes to kiss him. “There’s always tomorrow.”

  “Story of my life,” he teases.

  We happily walk down the stairs, hand in hand, and greet the rest of the families standing in the foyer. “Hey, what took you guys so long?” I ask, stepping off of the last step. I notice there’s an extra person with them, but I’m not sure who it is.

  Rachael and Chase join us from the guest room. “We were beginning to worry about you,” Rachael says sincerely.

  The woman standing with Mom and Dad turns around. Her left eye is swollen shut with purplish coloring around it, and her lip, which is also swollen, has sutures in it. My heart drops to the pit of my stomach.

  “I’m sorry, Ava. I didn’t mean to ruin your holiday.”

  I look at the door, almost expecting to see Brett standing there, when I realize he may be responsible for this. “Oh, Nichole, don’t be silly. You’re not ruining anything. Are you all right?”

  “I will be. I didn’t want to come, but your mom and dad insisted.”

  I need to know who did this. “Is Brett with you?”

  “No.”

  That’s my answer. Brett is responsible for hurting her. “You’re not ruining our holiday. You’re always welcome, and I want you to stay for as long as you want.”

  “That’s right, Nichole. We have room and you can stay here as long as you need to,” Skylar confirms.

  “Thank you. I just need a day or two to figure some things out.”

  “I’ll make some tea,” Rachael says. “Daniel and Drew, would you mind helping me?”

  “I’ll come with you,” Xander says.

  Once they are out of the room, I have to ask, “Did Brett do this to you?”

  Her lip quivers and a tear falls down her blotchy face.

  Dad says, “We took her to the hospital where they stitched up her lip, and she also filed a report with the police.”

  I shiver and close my eyes. Connor used to beat me, not that I remember, but there is proof of such beatings. Did he learn it from his dad? Is domestic violence inherited or learned or taught?

  Opening my eyes, I ask, “Did they arrest him?”

  Dad says, “Not yet. If they did, we haven’t heard.”

  “You probably want to take a hot bubble bath,” I say to Nichole.

  “That would be nice, thank you.”

  “Room eight’s empty.” Skylar walks towards the stairs. “There’s a clean robe in the closet, and there’s some toiletries in the bathroom you can use.”

  “Thank you, I appreciate everything.” She walks slowly behind Skylar to her room. Once she’s out of view, Mom says, “I have an extra nightgown she can wear for tonight.”

  “She’ll need something for tomorrow or however long she’ll be here,” I say. I hope she’ll be here for a long time. I hope she won’t cave in and go back to that jerk. I know people do. I think they love the person so much, they really want to believe them when they say “it’ll never happen again.” It usually does happen again, and the beatings are worse the next time. “She’ll need something for the pain. I’ll get her some hot tea and some Tylenol.”

  Nichole showers and I take her some tea and pain meds. She doesn’t leave the room that night. Maybe it’s from embarrassment, I don’t know. She has nothing to be embarrassed about.

  The next morning, Skylar’s mom, Jessica, is already up. We run to Walmart to get Nichole some underclothes, a nightgown, and other clothing for a few days. When we get back, I start the coffee and put the turkey in the oven. As the coffee brews, everyone starts to gather in the kitchen, even Nichole. Her eye looks worse than it did yesterday. I don’t say anything, and neither does anyone else. Mom and I set the coffee cups, creamer, and sugar out on the table for everyone. Skylar hea
ts up the breakfast casserole in the second oven.

  “I’m sorry I ruined your Thanksgiving,” she says sadly.

  I look at Nichole with a doleful look. “You didn’t ruin our holiday.”

  “I didn’t?”

  “No, not at all. You’re here, you’re alive, the exterior injuries will heal, and you’re making a step to better your future. I’m thankful for that. I’m also thankful that Xander and his family are here with us, and …”

  “We’re happy that you’re here with us this year, Ava,” Mom interrupts.

  Not everyone knows what she means by her statement, and I don’t want to go into it. “See, we have lots to be thankful for today.”

  Nichole fills her coffee mug, “I guess we do. Thank you for having me.”

  “You’re family, you’re always welcome.”

  Chapter Two: Thanksgiving Joy or Holiday Terror

  Xander

  This Thanksgiving is different from the ones from my past. The past few days I’ve been feeling sorry for myself, but this morning Ava put things into perspective for me, for all of us.

  Even with everything that Nichole and Ava have been through, Ava is still grateful to be alive and has found many reasons to be thankful. I know about Ava’s memory loss, and I’m certain that this isn’t the first time Nichole has been beaten by her husband.

  This may be my last Thanksgiving, and I’m grateful to be spending it with Ava, my family, and everyone else in the house. Nichole’s eye is swollen shut and is already black and blue from bruising. Her stitches to her top lip make it difficult for her to eat and drink, even with a straw, but she is still grateful to see another day. We all could learn something from her. There’s a lot to be thankful for this year.

  I thought that her husband would be calling her, begging her for forgiveness, but I haven’t seen her on her cell phone once. Maybe he’s already in jail and he won’t be a problem for her. That’s a nice thought.

  As much as I would like to sit in the kitchen and watch Ava, I have work of my own I need to attend to. I have a book that I need to finish, and then I can rest and enjoy the time I have left with Ava and my family. I hope Lost in Savannah will be my best book ever. I like the title, but I have been thinking of changing it to Dying in Savannah. This book will have more meaning than any of my other books. This book I hope will say in writing everything I’m not yet able to vocalize in this life. I have so much that I want to say, but I can’t find the words to tell Ava in person. It’s too soon to voice my strong, barely-in-control feelings. I know that. The way I feel about her would surely frighten her and she would run far and fast away from me.